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Rather than offend somebody and say a bad word, they are just going to keep letting them do what they are doing,” Di Marco said.

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The teens have been desensitized by the sexual messages on television, in movies, in magazines, and from their friends.

But parents would never imagine that these things are taking place.

One of the most common misconceptions that teens have, Di Marco said, is that oral sex is harmless and not really considered to be sex at all. Most teens do not realize that oral sex can transmit many of the same STDs that can also be contracted through intercourse.

Di Marco said that many of the teens she hears from grew up in good Christian homes but still gave in to sexual temptation in their dating relationships.

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“Teen girls don’t understand what virginity is,” Di Marco says, “so everything except intercourse is considered okay even by Christian girls.” These behaviors can include everything from deep kissing and heavy petting to oral sex.

In some cities she visited, teens told Di Marco that a rite of passage from eighth grade into high school was attending a “rainbow party” – a gathering where girls apply different colors of lipstick and provide oral sex to the boys in attendance.

This often means learning the slang terms that teens use for sexual acts and being willing to broach uncomfortable topics.

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