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As someone that’s lived through this scenario, I’ll start out by saying that you’re missing the point. Perhaps your girlfriend suddenly added a password to her phone.

Perhaps she’s been spending time with friends more often, or is being secretive and vague when you ask her questions. Your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, your eyes laser beam over to her cell phone, and before you know it, you’re scrolling through her text messages, looking for a reason you feel a knife twisting in your gut every time she says she’s going out with friends.

You know something’s off, but you can’t quite put your finger on it. Well this same theme plays out in many different ways in relationships.

Maybe you don’t check her phone, but you look through her emails instead.

So for all of you considering checking your partner’s phone that haven’t yet pulled the trigger: Don’t do it.

Stop trying to control the situation and start taking responsibility for what you can control: YOU.

Why do you need proof that cheating is occurring to acknowledge that you don’t feel safe in the relationship?

Speak up, confront the issue head on, and have a conversation about it. Go and have a real conversation about that twisting feeling in your gut.

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